I haven’t really appreciated the air lately, so I went outside today and inhaled really deeply. What I felt in my chest, more like my heart…really scared me. I literally felt my heart strain and it felt as if it would trigger a heart attack. So I inhaled again, and sure enough the pain was there. This time around, I literally had to punch my own chest because I was afraid that it would fail me. It wasn’t just a emotional or mental pain, it was physical. How can I let this happen to me?
I need to cut out smoking cigarettes. It’s really putting some wear and tear on my heart…I can’t believe I’m smoking cancer sticks. I can’t believe that I have resorted to this ugly thing. Now I’m taking up this new habit? What the fuck am I doing? I feel dirty.
Everytime I walk by someone smoking, I crave it. I always thought to myself that there is no way I can get addicted to this, and here I am…publishing a post on it.
I’m asking you readers as a favor, if you catch me smoking a cigarette…please do me a favor and knock that shit out of my hands. I don’t really have good judgement lately because my mind has been so clouded. So please, as a friend…save me.
Filed under: Life, Random Thoughts, Rants, Self-motivation , Cancer, Cigarette, Dirty, Friend, Habit, Heart, Herbs, Pain, Scared, Smoking, Strain, Ugly
